Ewwww....I don't always like to talk about my feeling ( ask Evan), I am pretty good at bottling things up until I am going to burst. At least this blog post wont be anything to deep so I think I can handle it!
I thought I would do a quick post on how I ( and the kid) are handling our return to Africa in 21 days.
When we first made the choice to go to Africa it was an adventure but a SCARY adventure, Evan and I were so busy with preparing to go that the depth of our decision didn't fully hit me until I arrived in Kinshasa Now said FULLY just because a lot of it did hit me before we left but not as hard as it hit once we arrived.
I don't have that this time, I know what we are going to and what life is like...no surprises this time! Who am I kidding it is Kinshasa...life is never boring!
Now knowing what is happening has positives and negatives, there is no unknown with the conditions you are moving to, I can picture everything, I remember the smells and the sounds. I also remember the heartache that I experienced over the last year. I am hoping to grow through this heartache.
Last year when we were in Africa I lost some Canadian friendships that at the time I cherished but a lot of my friendships also grew deeper and have taken on a whole new level. These are the friends that I will have for life no matter what is thrown your way!
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You know what, I don't want to compare this time to last time. The first year in Africa I was SO sick ( I haven't blog about it, maybe one day), so sick that I came back to Canada to be diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis and issues with my stomach acid.
I am looking forward to returning to Africa for 2 main reasons, the biggest one is Evan and I have been living apart for almost 13 months but in our hearts we are not separated. We get to be a family again and the second one is I want to experience Kinshasa healthy, strong and with open eyes! I don't want last year to taint my views on life out there.
Don't get me wrong, my heart aches, tears threaten to fall and I feel like I can't breath at the thought of saying goodbye to my friends and family again, the thought of leaving my job which I LOVE makes me nauseous and at times I am scared to go back to Kin. I get scared when the "what if's" in my head take over. My driving force is knowing that I will soon be with my hubby again and the kids with there dad.
As much as I don't always like talking about my feelings ask questions if you have them, I will answer!
To everyone who reads our blog, welcome to chapter 2 of the Africa journey. I am trying to make a commitment to blog a lot more often this time around.
I thought I would do a quick post on how I ( and the kid) are handling our return to Africa in 21 days.
When we first made the choice to go to Africa it was an adventure but a SCARY adventure, Evan and I were so busy with preparing to go that the depth of our decision didn't fully hit me until I arrived in Kinshasa Now said FULLY just because a lot of it did hit me before we left but not as hard as it hit once we arrived.
I don't have that this time, I know what we are going to and what life is like...no surprises this time! Who am I kidding it is Kinshasa...life is never boring!
Now knowing what is happening has positives and negatives, there is no unknown with the conditions you are moving to, I can picture everything, I remember the smells and the sounds. I also remember the heartache that I experienced over the last year. I am hoping to grow through this heartache.
Last year when we were in Africa I lost some Canadian friendships that at the time I cherished but a lot of my friendships also grew deeper and have taken on a whole new level. These are the friends that I will have for life no matter what is thrown your way!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You know what, I don't want to compare this time to last time. The first year in Africa I was SO sick ( I haven't blog about it, maybe one day), so sick that I came back to Canada to be diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis and issues with my stomach acid.
I am looking forward to returning to Africa for 2 main reasons, the biggest one is Evan and I have been living apart for almost 13 months but in our hearts we are not separated. We get to be a family again and the second one is I want to experience Kinshasa healthy, strong and with open eyes! I don't want last year to taint my views on life out there.
Don't get me wrong, my heart aches, tears threaten to fall and I feel like I can't breath at the thought of saying goodbye to my friends and family again, the thought of leaving my job which I LOVE makes me nauseous and at times I am scared to go back to Kin. I get scared when the "what if's" in my head take over. My driving force is knowing that I will soon be with my hubby again and the kids with there dad.
As much as I don't always like talking about my feelings ask questions if you have them, I will answer!
To everyone who reads our blog, welcome to chapter 2 of the Africa journey. I am trying to make a commitment to blog a lot more often this time around.
4 comments:
Hey Mel! Thanks for sharing your feelings... even though it isn't easy! I understand what it's like to leave friends/family, lose friends, and adjust to a completely foreign culture. Praying for you! Keep posting :-)
Lorissa
Love you guys, you're doing what you need to do! We're going to miss you though :(
Jen
Bella, I'm SO glad for all of you that you're coming back.
Two ideas for making Kinshasa a more sane experience? Drive (i.e. drive yourself) and find (/make) meaningful work.
You've GOT this
Warm hugs, xo, S
Wow Mel, I can't imagine the journey you've been through/are going through. You have a great attitude and I know from experience that being a family again after not being one for so long makes the heartache of moving, worth it. God bless <3
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